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Eight Random Videos #1: Spanking Orange Horses, Saving Eagles

11.10.2009 · Posted in NBA, NFL, NHL

I really need no introduction. And yet since it’s my first post and all, I’m David Chalk, renowned and acclaimed baseball writer from Bugs&Cranks and occasionally Big League Stew.  EVERY TUESDAY I’ll be throwing up Eight Random Videos to entertain and/or enlighten right here on NESW Sports.

Here’s what you should scroll down for in 8RV#1:

  • 1. The Cleveland Cavaliers Rich History Of Spanking
  • 2&3. Finally! The Orange Sherbet Buccaneer Uniforms Return
  • 4&5. I put four big ones on Sean Avery on Sunday
  • 6. Got my DVR set for Jimmy The Greek
  • 7. Saving The Eagles Season Part I: McNabb Sucks
  • 8. Saving The Eagles Season Part II: Reid Sucks

1. The Cleveland Cavaliers Rich History Of Spanking

If you saw the Shaq spanking video on Stacheketball last week, perhaps you thought Shaq was being groundbreaking, as he so often is.  And yet not too long ago there was this gem from Wally Szczerbiak and LeBron James:

(I’d like to apologize to Shaq for in any way comparing him to someone as lame as Wally Szczerbiak.)

2&3. The Long Awaited Return Of The Orange Sherbet Buccaneer Uniforms

While I’m a huge Devil Rays fan, I’ve hated the Buccaneers every since they changed over to those hideous wannabe red Raiders unis.  So it was great to see the orange sherbet run wild over the Packers on Sunday:

The record says it all: Orange Bucs 1-0, Hideous Red Bucs 0-7.  (We might also note that victory also coincided with The Mayor Of Devil Ray Town making his Joe Bucs Fan debut.  The Mayor also directs us to gratuitous cheerleader photos in the glorious orange.)

Meanwhile The Way Back Machine that is youtube brings us Irv Cross interviewing the greatest player to ever wear the orange sherbet:

4&5. I put four big ones on Sean Avery on Sunday

I didn’t see much of the Bucs game on Sunday because I was making some coin playing the ponies at Aqueduct.  I won in race number three by betting on the 3:5 favorite, a horse named Sean Avery.

I would never bet on a horse named Jaromir Jagr though.  All that damn hair would slow it down too much.

6. Got my DVR set for Jimmy The Greek

Speaking of Irv Cross and gambling, I’m psyched to watch the 30 on 30 doc on Jimmy The Greek. Not that I’ve gotten around to watching the ones I taped of Donald Trump: USFL Apprentice or In The Heat Of The Night: The Colts Sneak Out Of Baltimore. Any way, this brief snippet of shocking racist crazy talk should wet your whistles:

The NY Post’s Phil Mushnick says Jay-Z’s just as bad as Jimmy The Greek. Discuss.

7. Saving The Eagles Season Part I: Donovan McNabb Has Always Sucked
What a disappointing week for Philly sports.  I’ve said all I’m gonna say about one group of chokers, but how do the Eagles lose at home to freakin’ Dallas?  Well it might help if they bench that overrated good-for-nothing quarterback of theirs and put in one of the greatest, most electrifying players to ever grace the college or pro game:

Interesting side note to that video: I think I might have been at that game against Temple at the Vet.  I was definitely at the Sugar Bowl.

8. Saving The Eagles Season Part II: Andy Reid Has Always Sucked

Talk about division titles and playoffs appearances, which are impressive by Philly standards, and ignore how weak the NFC East has been for over a decade.  I guarantee a Super Bowl if you just give me Vick at QB and bring back the greatest coach in Eagle history:

Granted the NFC East returns of Gibbs and Parcells didn’t go all that well, but Vick is a million times better than Romo or Campbell.


Thus concludes the first edition of Eight Random Videos.  I hope they were everything you expected: Random, Eight in number, entertaining, enlightening.  Comments and gratitude are always welcome.

5 Responses to “Eight Random Videos #1: Spanking Orange Horses, Saving Eagles”

  1. […] Here’s eight random videos.  They have very little in common, except that all are sport-related, and all are awesome.  Though the headline has spanking in it, there is no sexy follow-up.  That’s about it.  What more do you want from me?  Click the damn link and see for yourself.  <neswsports> […]

  2. […] Eight Random Videos #1: Spanking Orange Horses, Saving Eagles – Because nothing’s better than video randomnity, and yes, I know ‘randomnity’ is not a word (Pronounced: Ran-Dim-Nitty) […]

  3. […] old friend David Chalk made his debut over at NESW Sports. [NESW Sports] Click and share with the […]

  4. […] first minute or two of this video has Jimmy The Greek (previously in 8RV1) narrating and interviewing New Orleans fans in advance of the first Saints playoff game.  It also […]

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